Chinese · Episode 20
I Chose the Outside
Spoken by 晓航
Jealous, for one hour, of his sister’s safe indoor job, then ashamed, because he chose the outside.
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Episode text
妹妹在圆顶里面干活。 My little sister works inside the dome.
放学以后,她去看那些机器人。 After school, she goes to see those robots.
有一个脸上画了兔子,那是她自己画上去的。 One has a rabbit painted on its face—she painted it herself.
丢了,她就跑去找。找到了,回家吃饭。 If it's gone, she runs off to find it. When she finds it, she goes home to eat.
门在里面,空气也在里面。 The door is inside, and the air is inside too.
花园就在旁边,妈妈也在。 The garden is right there, and Mom is there too.
有一天我有点羡慕她,真的也就一个小时。 One day I felt a little envious of her—really just for an hour.
我在外面,手上都是灰,周围一点声音也没有。 I was outside, hands covered in dust, not a sound around.
要走很远,才看得到那扇门。 You have to walk a long way before you can even see that door.
那时候我想到她。 That's when I thought of her.
她推一下,机器人就走了,她自己也跟着走了。 She gives it a push, the robot moves, and she walks along with it.
这在她那儿是很平常的事。 For her, that's completely ordinary.
那一个小时里我一直在想: That whole hour I kept thinking:
我也想有那样一扇门。 I want a door like that too.
想有人在旁边跟我说话。 I want someone beside me talking to me.
想一下班就能看见花园。 I want to see the garden the moment I get off work.
想去找一个画了兔子的东西, I want to go looking for something with a rabbit painted on it,
不是一天到晚在灰里找石头。 not spending all day digging for rocks in the dust.
后来那一个小时想完了。 Then that hour of thinking was over.
我自己都有点不好意思。 I felt a little embarrassed myself.
外面这条路是我自己选的。 This path outside is one I chose myself.
不是她把我推出来的,是我自己走出来的。 She didn't push me out—I walked out on my own.
她的工作在门里面。 Her work is inside the door.
我的工作在门外面。 My work is outside the door.
两边其实都是干活。 Both sides are really just work.
阿金看了我一眼,问我:是不是想家了? Ajin glanced at me and asked, Missing home?
我说:想的是妹妹的工作。 I said, What I miss is my sister's job.
他笑了,说:那你去画兔子吧。 He laughed and said, Then go paint a rabbit.
我摇摇头,说还是不了。 I shook my head and said, Nah, never mind.
我还是留在这儿。 I'll stay here.
灰还在手上,门还很远。 Dust still on my hands, the door still far away.
这些都是我自己选的。 I chose all of this myself.
选了就不要再说了。 Once you've chosen, don't bring it up again.
那一个小时,过了也就过了。 That hour—once it passed, it passed.